Not what I wanted to be thankful for

I cant believe this thanksgiving what I am thankful for is the fact my husband and mom are supporting me through cancer. I wanted to be thankful for my awsome new job, the places i get to travel, the people i get to work with, spending time with Jeremy. I love the fact I have health insurance and I dont have to worry about how I am going to pay for all these bills, but I dont want to have to worry about this. 

I am almost done with the first set of horrible chemo. I have finished 3 out of the 4 sessions. The first 2 sessions were really hard mentally and physically. I slept a lot the first 2 times. This time I bounced back a lot faster. I still dont feel like me but I think that will take a while. I lost my hair, and I think thats why I am having a hard time getting back to being me. I dont feel pretty, I dont look like my self, i feel like a shell and I dont want to but it feels like it will never end.