Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Not what I wanted to be thankful for

I cant believe this thanksgiving what I am thankful for is the fact my husband and mom are supporting me through cancer. I wanted to be thankful for my awsome new job, the places i get to travel, the people i get to work with, spending time with Jeremy. I love the fact I have health insurance and I dont have to worry about how I am going to pay for all these bills, but I dont want to have to worry about this. 

I am almost done with the first set of horrible chemo. I have finished 3 out of the 4 sessions. The first 2 sessions were really hard mentally and physically. I slept a lot the first 2 times. This time I bounced back a lot faster. I still dont feel like me but I think that will take a while. I lost my hair, and I think thats why I am having a hard time getting back to being me. I dont feel pretty, I dont look like my self, i feel like a shell and I dont want to but it feels like it will never end.


Wednesday, October 16, 2013

2B or not 2B?

Found out the stage of my cancer. I have stage 2b. All that means is I had a tumore between 2 cm and 5cm (mine was 3.5) and the cancer spread to the lymphnodes. Luckily it was only 1 of the 8 they took out. I still dont have a treatment plan, that will come tomorrow (October 17th) and Ill post it for sure. 
I have been givng my self shots every night to grow my eggs to harvest them. Thats sounds so wrong but I am so so scared that the chemo will kill all my eggs and kill my chances at having a family. With my luck if i didnt do this I couldnt have kids, my luck fucking sucks. 
Thats all the update I have for now. Ill do more tomorrow

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Bitching

I am just all around mad. Mad at this whole fucking situation! I see posts on FaceBook about hwo people ar sick of being sick. You have a cold, its just uncomfortable. I used to bitch about having colds and now it seems so so dumb. There is so much else that could go wrong. Even now i feel bitching about my cancer is dumb because people have way worse cancer then I do.
I also feel so so jealous of the people just bitching about a cold. I wish thats all I had. Also my roommates have pissed me off, bitching about the TV being on in the middle of the day. 1) Its so quite they cant fucking hear it 2) Im sorry I had surgery and being able to move is very very hard 3) I just fought with insuance companies for 4 hours, 3)I deserve to eat my burrito and watch law and order SVU to get out of my own hell, for an hour.
I am mad at my body for betraying me. I have to now go though all this stuff i never wanted to even think about. I have to make decision after decision.  I am so tired. to much to do. Trying to figure out what I have to do. There is more I have to get doen before I can start Chemo. I dont evern know where to start. ucking insurance, why the hell do I have to deal with this while Im sick?


My path remport came back from my last surgery, they went in a cleared the margins of my first surgery and took 8 lymph nodes. Out of the 8 only 1 had cancer. Which is great news but I am still so sore. Now I have to worry about freezing embryos, if I want a mastectomy ect.

Monday, September 23, 2013

Grounded

I know this blog is supposed to be about my wonderful life flying. Well thats going to be on hold for 6-8 months due to this stupid thing called cancer!
I just had my second surgery on September 20th. They went in through the other surgical site to clear out what was left of the cancer cells. They also took some lymphnodes to test to see if there were any cancer cells in them. They took 3 and they were all negitive but the oncologist wanted one more just to be sure. And of course that one had cancer cells so they had to take a few more to test. I was under for about 3 hours. Now I have a lovly drainage tube hanging out of my side.
Hopefully I get it taken out this week. It is making me gag every time and ew. thats all ew.

I have 2 more doctor appointments this week. One with a plastic surgeon and one with a reproductive specialist to talk about freezing me eggs. That is the scariest thing. Also waiting for the genetic test to see if I have the cancer gene. If I do, I dont even know what Ill do. So many decisions coming my way I am terrified.

I have started a cancer website that I will be posting on when I need help with doctor appointments things like that. Please check it out!

Also on October 12th there is a walk raising money for breast cancer! Check it out donate and join my team!
 All links are posted below!

I want to thank everyone for their support over this past week and a half. It has been a crazy one. Feel free to stop by anytime Ill be in SLC for a bit. And for all you out of towners there is extra space for you!

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/MakingStridesAgainstBreastCancer/MSABCCY13GW?team_id=1494493&pg=team&fr_id=55773

https://mycancercircle.lotsahelpinghands.com/c/709101/

Sunday, September 15, 2013

the scariest word I know

As I told you in my last post I had surgery to remove a lump from my breast. My doctor who first felt it and saw my ultra sound said it looked noon cancerous. The surgeon who took out the lump said the exact same thing. So I went back to work on Wednesday got an amazing trip with amazing people. Flew from Phoenix to Charlotte then out to Portland. Had a 24 hour layover and planned all these amazing things to go do because I have  never been there.
So in the morning my crew (sarah, rebecca, and carl) and I went to the metro and got on to head down town to get done voodoo doughnuts then keep exploring Portland. We got off the metro and I was guiding. I had to pause because my doctors office was calling.
Then the one weird I didn't ever want to hear I heard. Cancer. After that I blacked out. Everyone was so so positive it wasn't cancer and then blam.. Cancer.
So there I am in the middle of Portland crying trying to figure out anything what to do how to feel. Luckily my crew was with me and they helped me figure out what to do. I called in sick to work. My doctor wanted me home that same day. No way I could have worked the rest of the trip. He was taking care of my emotional needs. I think it might be a while before I can work.
After calling in sick I tried to call Jeremy and my mom. Both of them were not in a place to answer the phone. I called then both straight for like 30 minutes. Finally my mom answered and I'm bawling telling her that I have cancer. She said she was coming home right then. She bought a plane ticket and was home that night. Jeremy finally called me back while I was on the metro back to the hotel to pack my things and head to the airport. I told him and the first thing he did is say he is driving home (he was working in Boise).
I got a direct flight on southwest from Portland to slc. I was crying on and off the entire day. I couldn't tell anyone I wasn't ready. The only people who knew were my mom Jeremy and his family.
We don't know what stage I have our what I might have to do but they said I need one more surgery and chemo.
On Monday I am getting an MRI Tuesday and Thursday meeting with doctors to plan out the surgery and treatment options.
I'll try to keep this updated as it goes on but who knows how this is going to go.
I just can't believe that I have breast cancer.

Monday, September 9, 2013

Timeoff... Unwanted

I had surgery and took me out of work for 6 days. before those 6 days i had 3 days off and after the 6days I have 2 days off. I havent worked in a long time! I am going crazy just sitting at home. It wasnt so bad when Jeremy was around but he left for Idaho for the week. I was supposed to go with him to Boise but at last minute they decided to send him to Ketchum which is 3 hours away from Boise. I dont go to work until wednesday the 11th! But because I have no hours this month I'm hoping that they will give me a trip instead of making me sit reserve. I have been looking to see the trips open and Im hoping I am the most senior with the leased amount of hours because there is a great trip with 2 amazing layovers. But knowing my luck I wont get it.

Jeremy is back in th running for a job at Lake Havasu. We are ready to move out of this place. Love our house, but there is nothng here for us any more. Jeremy cant grow in his current job, and our marriage cant last us continuning to commute back and forth. We are starting to look at other jobs around the country. Jeremy isnt ready to make a huge move to the east coast, but I really want to. I am 100% ready to move. There is a job in Lancaster PA that is close to PHL. The only down side is that I would be flying with people I really dont want to. Oh well the trips would be so much better, maybe international. There is also a job in North Carolina that I want Jeremy to look at, but it is so vauge I dont think he is. I kinda want to move to NC. The CLT trips are great and I like the people there.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Great Words

I recieved some great words from my supervisor today and I want to share them, also once I lose the paper I want to be able to remember when I have a bad flight.

"Gabby smiled and said hello to every boarding passanger. This is a great way to set the tone for the flight. She  was also aware of customers that moved to the EE row and was quick to breif them on the responsibilies. Great awareness to saftey."

"It is obvious that Gabby excels at customer service. Weather she is boarding, performing service, or deplaning, she is constantly smiling and making eye contact. These things do so much to create repete customers"

"Gabby offers an overall great performance. Her customer service is exemplified by her smile, engagment and manners. Gabby is exaclty what we need in the cabin of our fleet."

It is nice to know that is how I am seen doing my job. And when he saw me it was the end of a long 4 day and I had to get up at 430am to do a flight befroe he even saw me. He said he couldnt tell that I was at the end of a 4 day and that I had gotten up so early. Lucky for me I knew he was down on the plane before i boarded and I pulled my hair up.

I have been flying a bunch getting my hours in which is nice. I like the extra money. Trying to save up for my France trip next year. Also trying to save for Jeremys birthday trip this year. Still waiting to get a Hawaii trip or an Anchorage trip. Hopefully soon! I am #13 for a 2 day tomorrow so I get an extra day off. I would rather be home but hopefully soon Jere and I will live in the same place and I can be home with him and the monsters on my days off.

Saturday, August 3, 2013

Home

Right now I am loving this song.  my favorite lines is "Well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me."
I dont regret at all being a flight attendant, I just miss Jeremy and the monsters so much.

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Things You Should Know As A Passenger:

All the things I am listing have happened to me recently:

1. Keep your feet out of the aisle. I walk there, a lot, and I usually have a heavy cart and will run you over. Also if I am in a hurry or not looking I will trip. I am fine asking you one, but seriously 6 times in like 10 minutes? please stop trying to break me.
2. You are a big boy (you know 40+) flush the damn toilet after you pee! It is gross for me to walk in there and the bowl is open with foamy pee just waiting for me to flush. Gross.
3. If you are at a bulkhead put your shit up. We say it enough over the intercom I shouldn't have to come over and have you bitch at me for it when I ask you to put it up.
4. Do not get up while we are on the ground moving! Especially if it is something dumb like you want a new seat. You had 30+ minutes to realize who you were sitting next to. You get no sympathy from me.
5. Do not get up when we have stated to remain seated and then proceded to very loudly say "I have the runs" god TMI.
6. Do not ask me where we are. I am not a gps, if you ask me I will say "In the air" "Over clouds" or "In a plane" I dont have time to call the captain and ask for a play by play of where we are. Download flight tracker and track it while in the air.

I cant think of any others right now but Im sure Part 2 isnt far behind.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Update From 34,000 Feet.

No I am not working I am non-reving back to SLC for the night. Because work was dumb and wouldnt release me until late I cant make it to Boise tonight. So I am going to spend the night at the basement with my loves!
I am transferring back to Phoenix! My last day in Philly is the 20th. And that night I will fly home with my mom for a whole week and a little more. Still waiting what my schedule is in PHX but I hoping to get all the way to the 5th off. On the 28-30th Jeremy and I are going to San Fransisco! Love having free flights and we got a free hotel room!
I was on for 5 days and didnt get a single call. I have never just sat for 5 days on reserve! I have not been sleeping. I have been super depressed, just wanting to lay in bed and do nothing. And then when I want to sleep I cant. The only times I can really sleep are when I am at home or at my moms. Hopefully the move to PHX will make it better. Being closer to home. I dont think the depression will really go away until Jere and I can finally live in the same place, at the same time!

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Trips Trips and then No trips!

I havent posted in forever. After base orientation I have been working like crazy! I worked 40 hours in 2 weeks. That's a lot of flying. I know normal people work 40 hours a week but thats not in the air! So far I have only overnighted in Tampa and Phoenix. Nothing special. A lot of OPR (on premise reserve) And a couple of one day trips.
I am loving it no matter what I am doing! This month I havent been flying to much an that sucks I want some killer over nights! Everyone else seems to get them but I dont. So lame. I dont even know If I will be called this weekend at all. Today I am number 59 to be called and tomorrow it will jump up to over 100. I want to be called so I can work Sunday morning so I can fly back to SLC early.
On Tuesday I had the day off so my mom and I went in to NYC and got to see a special preview at the MET of their new Punk gallery. It was so cool. I only got a couple pictures so Ill post them below.  Then we went to McGees, My favorite pub in NYC. It is the bar that McClarens is based after on How I Met Your Mother. The food is Delicious and drinks are cheap. Later that night we went and saw Cinderella on Broadway  It was good. The costume changes were amazing! Loved it!
                                                           Black Trash Bags
                                                            Grocery Bags

                                                        My favorite!

Friday, April 19, 2013

Finally "on-line"

I have finally made it to Philly. My little apartment is so cute! Everyone should come visit me! I love in a great little university city. Walking is super safe, I want to get a bike and start biking around.
Yesterday (the 18th) I had my orientation at base. We just went over scheduling and known crew member line, and showing us where the crew rooms are located. I bid for my May line, fingers crossed I get a good one. At 3 everyone's phones started ringing, people stated getting trips for today. My phone whent off at almost 4, and by then all the trips were covered and all that was left was OPR (on premise reserve). So I took that so they couldn't call me at 2 am for a flight.  My shift is noon to 4. So I am just sitting here. And ill probably be getting a call again at 3 for flights for tomorrow.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Week 4

I cant believe week 4 is over! I cant believe I have been here a full month. This time went so much faster then the 3 weeks at mesa. We got to wear our uniforms to class. They are ok, I am just excited for the new ones getting designed.
We had a half day on friday and got to go to the hanger. So much fun playing on the planes! My last thing to do is OE. Mine is tomorrow! So excited!






Sunday, March 31, 2013

Hell Week

Hell week, or week 3 as the instructors call it, is over! Tests every day for a week. And I aced all of them! Im not normally cocky but this is what I was ment to do. I am damn good at my job, I pay attention, and I work hard in class.
We got to go through a decompression, and we got to jump down the slide that comes out of the airplane, and went to the pool for a raft drill.  Long long week but its done! All thats left is one test on Monday (tomorrow) and OE on the 8th. I get almost a 3 day weekend this upcoming weekend. I get done Friday at 1 and then show up for my OE 6am next Monday morning. I am so excited for my OE. I am going with my Joann. We are going to DTW (Detriot MI) the layover is only an hour so no time to explore, just work. But when I get back that night Jere and my Mom will be waiting for me. So yey!
Here are some pictures from this week.

                                                              Night out with my favorites




                                                         Decompression day



                                                                 Pool day!

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Base city







Yes I got philly as my base! I am actually so so so excited. So many opportunities to go to Europe!
I have started looking for houses to buy and Jeremy is looking for jobs. I am so excited about the east coast. I just cant wait to finish training and get out on the line!

Friday, March 15, 2013

Week 1

With week one almost over I think its time for an update! So far everything is just a review for me. 2nd airline training in 4 months. Rocked my first 2 tests with 100%s so im feeling pretty good. Monday-Thursday  class was from 7am till almost 6 every night, now that they have split the class in 2 (because we have 75 in out class) the group I am in gets to start at 1030 and get out between 8 and 9ish. But thats ok I am a night owl and I like sleeping in.
We get to play in actual trainers! Love them they can simulate any sort of emergency, like fire and smoke in the cabin. Also we get to go down the inflatable plane slide in week 3 and do water emergencies.
We also found out that today that getting PHX is very unlikely. A lot of other people from the first group are thinking about leaving the program because they cant get PHX. We our bids in for the bases and mine went:
1. PHX
2. PHL
3. DCA
4. CLT

Who knows what will happen with all these transfers coming in. But If i cant have PHX I really want PHL because they do so many European trips, more then any other base. How amazing would it be to go to Paris, or Italy for a weekend, and get paid for it! Gah I love my job. But I also cant wait until Jere and I can live together.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Training Date!

I passed my background check, and the first time! Mesa just hard core sucks, US airways got my fingerprints to work with the exact same machine and in less time with more people to get fingerprinted. I got my class date of March 11 2013. Eek so soon! I also received my training packet and have been studying like crazy. I am driving the Mazda down to Phoenix on the 9th of March and staying with Joann that night then off to the hotel on the 10th. My new home for 4 weeks. But I get a room to myself in a pretty nice hotel.  I have a feeling this time ill be more social after class because I think Ill have to study harder because they require a higher percentage and there is more to learn. And I actually like people in my hotel (I know 2) already).
I graduate April 9th and hopefully I can come back right after to spend some time with Jere and the monsters. And hopefully I can move Bay and Brandy down soon. And I hope Jere can find a job in AZ soon so the family can be together!

Thursday, January 31, 2013

And I'm Back In The Game!

I got hired by US AIRWAYS! Omg I cant even begin to describe how happy and thrilled I am. I really was convinced I was going to bet through one round then go home. But here is the story :)
On January 15th my friend called and told me US airways was hiring for their Phoenix base. She had applied the day before and had received the call to schedule a face to face (F2F). She encouraged me to apply so I did. I finally received an email on January 20th to call them for a phone interview. I finally got to talk to a real  person and not a machine on January 23rd. I passed and he schedule me for a F2F on January 30th.
So yesterday I woke up at 4:45 am to get ready. Anna was a sweetheart and picked me up and took me to the airport at 6. We finally made it, damn snow, and I ran to my gate, I was so worried I wouldn't make it but luckily I did!
Then once I got in to Phoenix I waited for a shuttle with a couple people. Once we got to the interview we met up with everyone else who had gotten in earlier. There were about 35 of us. We all went upstairs and sat through a presentation about the job. After that we went to the actual training facility proved we could fit in a Jumpseat and reach in to the overhead bin take out a AED and put it back. Easy easy! Then it was time for one on ones.
Because I am an "O" and they do it alphabetically so I had a while to sit. When they finally got to me I went back and sat down with the wonderful Megan. She asked me questions, and while I was answering them I was throwing in stories, to make her like me (think it worked!).
After all the one on ones were done they came in to the room and cut the 35 of us down to 21. We did a fun group activity in little groups of 4 and one group of 5 (the one i was in). After they cut us down again by about 5 people. Our group was the only one left fully intact! After that last cut, they came in and welcomed the rest of us to US AIRWAYS! holy shit! We were hugging everyone, from the other people hired to the recruiters. The first person I hugged was Megan. Without her, I would not have gotten through the one on one. She is the reason I got this far :).
We then had all the pre-hire paperwork to fill out, fingerprints, I9 and others. I also had to go get drug tested today.
I was then lucky enough to have my flight moved back and I got to go eat dinner with my lovely Joann. I miss her and cant wait to finally work with her again.

I still cant believe I got hired by a Main-Line. So amazing so lucky! out of 19,000 applicants they only need 190 Flight Attendants. Well motherfucker, I am one of those 190 now :) I cant believe it! Yey me.

To anyone out there who wants my secret of getting this job.... I was me. 100% I acted like I always do I spoke exactly like I do. No fakeness I didnt say what they wanted to hear, I said what I wanted to say.
And I never gave up this dream. I have had 4 interviews in the past 6 months and got 2 job offers.Nothing is impossible

Monday, January 14, 2013

Delta?

OMG i am so just dhsfiuhihvadv. Yes thats exaclty how Im feeling right now! Story time:
So tonight I randomly decided to search my email for things from delta. Somehow I missed an invitation to call a requiter about my Account Representative position that I applied for a couple days ago. I called and he asked me which one I was calling about and I told him the AR one. So he interviewed me for that and after he said he was going to push me through to the next round and someone would call me back sometime. I then asked him about my FA one and he explained  that he could only do one at a time and advised me to call right back after he hung up to find out.
So that is EXACTLY what I did! I called and talked to probably the greatest guy ever! I told him that I hadn't received an email but I had one for AR. He said something like, because you are taking invective  I will go ahead and give you your first interview! We talked forever! He was so amazing after the questions he informed me that he would be happy to push me through to the next round and schedule a 2nd phone interview on Wednesday! I couldn't believe it! over 100,000 applicants and I got a second interview! Thats impressive. Yey me. I might not get the job (probably not) But this is a step towards where I want to be! If all goes well on Wednesday I would go through to the final interview in Atlanta. This is exactly what I want!
Please send me all your good vibes, prayers, or whatever you do!

I am dancing around my bedroom to this song right now! Cant contain my happiness!

Thursday, January 10, 2013

Interviews

Hopefully I have a bunch of interviews coming up! I know I am going to Skywest interview on Feb 6th in Denver. I just applied to Horizon and Alaska Air. The best part about these 3 airlines is that they are all west coast! Horizon has Boise, which is good because that's where Jeremy is working right now. Alaska Air has a base in San Diego, and that is great because that is where Jeremy and I want to end up! And my cousins live there and I would love to be close to family. Horizon and Alaska Air both have Seattle! I miss living in Seattle and all my friends there :). And of course Skywest, all the training is done here in SLC and there is a base here.
Hopefully I hear back from Horizon and Alaska Air soon about interviews. I want to get back out flying. And not on the east coast!

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Moving on

So after some hard long thinking, I am not going back to Mesa. I am going to continue to look for a FA job but until that time ill go back to Weber and maybe work part time. I am so close to my degree that I should just finish it now. Skywest has interviews this month and I am really looking forward to going to the one in Chicago. I get to see Joann and Nelson and hopefully Ally. But if I dont go to the Chicago one Ill go to the Denver one.

I didnt get United, I am really bummed, I thought I had it but I guess not. I am still waiting to hear from Delta about an interview. I will not give up on this.

With Mesa I would never be home they pay checks arent worth it. People are almost working for free because their rent is to crazy. Cost of living is insane in CLT, and right now thats where they have me. Its impossible to get home because there are no direct flights to SLC. Chicago would be best but still so far away, and they probably wouldnt give me any time off anyways. So for now you are all stuck with me Until I get skywest or a mainline, no more applying for little unknown companys.

I will fly, but today just isnt that day, and Mesa is the wrong company for me.